It doesn’t have to be perfect

It’s about time I wrote something on here… It’s been a while.

Forgive me if it’s a short entry however, I wanted to post something to honour this little corner of the internet. And to express joy at a message that seems to resonate with so many. As well as thanks to those people that have been on the journey with me so far and those that have just jumped on board.

I was grateful to have been able to contribute to a brilliant feature by Kate Graham in the recent edition of The Sunday Telegraph’s, Stella Magazine. You can read it here .

The feature unpicks a number of areas that other recovering perfectionists or those afraid to ‘let go’ may relate to e.g. confidence knocks when something doesn’t go well or the way you thought it should; holding yourself back for fear of failure or ‘imperfect’ outcomes; ‘aspirational psychosis’ as dubbed by Karen Rinaldi in her book, ‘It’s Great to Suck at Something’, a crippling chasing of ‘the impossible’ or never ending goals.

There is so much good stuff out there right now when it comes to embracing ‘failure’ or at the very least, giving it an image overhaul. The feature cites some great places for you to start including Elizabeth Day’s, ‘How to Fail’, Reshma Saujani’s, ‘Brave Not Perfect’ as well as Karen Rinaldi’s book above.

As a mum of two daughters, I particularly love the work that Natalie Costa (also cited in the article) is doing when it comes to supporting children through the myth of perfect. It’s something we work hard on at home too – if there’s ever a spelling mistake – it’s literally just that. A mistake. Which in our house is a notch on the post of learning.

I’m so vehement when it comes to their learning that my default response to many of their questions is, “I don’t know.”

Okay. Quite often, I don’t actually know…

But, the point is I don’t want them growing up thinking that ‘grown ups’ have all the answers. Because we absolutely don’t.  The message is to stay curious and know that making mistakes is part of the journey we all go on. And the lessons learned when making them are often the best kind. It’s just part of the process.

It took me too long as an adult to realise that. So, I’m starting early with my girls.

If you get chance to read the feature, I’d love to know what you think. 

Thank you.


“If we are afraid to fail, we keep opportunities for growth, love and fulfilment out of reach.” Author, Karen Rinaldi. 


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